FRIENDSHIP BEFORE A LOVE RELATIONSHIP. NECESSARY OR NOT?

We live in a world where almost everyone is just going about and minding their own business. You sometimes wonder if you can find a shoulder to lean on when you’re not strong and someone you can trust and be vulnerable with without fear and panic in the days of adversity. This barely happens.

Nonetheless, we still have good people out there in the world, a handful of reliable, kind people who can look you in the eyes and say, “Hi, I’ve got your back through this.” These calibre of people are called FRIENDS.

A FRIEND is someone who sees you as important, values you and wants the best for you. You’re able to relate with him/her in all angles – from sharing ideas, dreams to talking freely on all issues (spiritual, emotional, intellectual, financial etc).

LET’S ADDRESS A FEW CONCERNS:

1. Should friendship be proposed?
Friendship happens under varied circumstances and in different ways and places.
We make friends with people from all walks of life. Sometimes, you meet someone for the first time at church, school, work or at an event etc and by virtue of interactions, you may exchange contacts. You may also meet someone whom you gave or gave you an assistance and that may also birth friendship. In any of these scenarios, it is clear that friendship is not proposed but is rather birthed naturally after you’ve both been in touch regularly for sometime. Some people all request if they could be friends with other people just like it’s done on Facebook.
In most cases, when someone proposes friendship to the opposite sex, it raises suspicions because that proposal probably has no basis.

  1. Is it bad to have multiple friends?
    I want to reiterate that friendship is just an avenue to know other people. You can choose to have as many friends with the opposite sex as you may want. But be sure that, all these people are adding to your life and you to theirs. You can hang out, have a date, visit and keep many godly friends around you. As you do this, watch and pray, then gradually, you start your zeroing in process. When this is done well, a time will come where you’ll notice one or two of your numerous friends have a lot of things in common with you. They share in your faith, goals, values, among a host of other things. They make time for you, show concern, want to know more about your Christian, educational, relationship and work life. When you begin to see these gestures, know that, your friendship is likely to move to another level.

To be continued next week Friday…

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